Purpose or Passion

 

 The past few weeks I started noticing a theme in things I was reading and conversations Kenny and I were having. When that happens, I usually know God is trying to get my attention. Or He wants me to consider something.

  A while ago, as Kenny started thinking about where the school is headed and what direction he should steer it in, he realized he needs to learn how to be an administer. As he hired three teachers and started a year with more students, he knew he needs to be a leader and lead well. Thankfully he has a brother in law in a management position. He was able to point Kenny in the right direction and give him things to think about. Around this same time Kenny stopped at a local book store and found some books on leadership. Since then, many of that type of book has made it's way into our house. I just finished one this week and was left asking the same question Kenny and I had talked about.

  What is my passion? And what is my purpose? I always figured God would give you a passion for your purpose, but is it possible to have a passion for something besides God's purpose for our lives? 

  I felt the call to Ghana, but lately I have been struggling. Yes, I am a missionary. Yes, I live in Africa, the land of little children just begging for attention. Yes, there are opportunities to help people all around me. But. What is my purpose? Why am I here at this time? It is easy to help people but even easier to create a dependency. How do I help and not hinder? Surely that is God's purpose. But how?

  We will soon be here for a year and a half. Half our time is gone already, assuming we get to spend a month in the US at the end of this year and leave exactly when our 3 years are up. What about then? What is our purpose after that? 

  What is our passion? We love to dream and talk about the things we would like to do. In Ghana and in the US. We know where we think we could make a difference in people's lives We know what age group and what kind of teaching and training excites us. We know what would be fun to do. 

  But what is our purpose? Where does God want us? Just because we can say, I am passionate about _________________, does that means that is God's purpose for our lives? Just because it would be fun, is it what God wants? Our ultimate and over riding purpose in life is to glorify God. And there are many ways we can do that.

  In a year and a half, will we be saying good-bye to Ghana, having served our purpose here, no matter how passionate we are about the work here? Or will we be staying because we feel it is what God wants for us, no matter how much we long for the "greener pastures" and comforts of the US? How do we decide what purpose God would have for us in the US? How do we know if our purpose is to stay here longer?

  Before you state the obvious and say, "Start praying!" let me say we have and will be praying! 

  What about you? Are you filling God's purpose for your life? God didn't just create you without a purpose. If that is being a mother, a teacher, or a doctor, you have a purpose! I think sometimes we look for the big and exciting things and forget the little behind the scenes work that needs doing too. And sometimes we get comfortable in our own little world and don't want to step out in faith and do the big things God created us for.

  I don't read many of Kenny's books about leadership but when I do, I always realize, they aren't just written for the people that lead churches, organizations, companies, etc. Each one of us, in some way is a leader. Or as we usually say, we all have someone that looks up to us. I am a leader in my own home with my children. Am I passionate about that? Do I look at it as God's purpose for my life? Do I look at it as an opportunity to do God's work? Do I see the impact I have on my children's lives? Their work ethic, their character, their small daily habits, I have the opportunity to shape them so that God can use them for the purpose God created them for. Am I passionate about it? Am I passionate about God's purpose for my life, however mundane it might be?

  I think it is possible that I have other purposes than being a mother, and that has been frustrating me lately. Surely God brought me to Ghana for other purposes than raising my children and supporting my husband. Really? Doesn't that sound like purpose enough? Several years ago, I was at a ladies seminar and I hope I never forget what the speaker said. A busy mom was telling her how she wished she had time for ministering to others and for reaching out. But she was tied down with her family at home and she just didn't feel like she could reach out. The lady told her to pray for God to send someone to her door. If she needs to be at home, she can ask God to bring someone to her. Because if we are sincere, God will answer. I was feeling house bound one day. It isn't easy to take all three children and stroll around our village chatting to people. I thought before moving here I could just go out and visit, but the realities of three shy children and the African heat, make it quite challenging! (Hot African sunshine does not make happy children!) And they are just too young to leave at home while I sit and chat in the village. So, we stay at home. And then I remembered the story that speaker told. Why not? Why not ask God to show me people that I can minister to? Why not ask him specifically to bring them to my door? And before you say, "Hello! Your on the mission field! What did you think you were going to do there?" There are a lot of people around me that need help and encouragement, but it is a lot more complicated then you can imagine! So recently that has been my prayer. Show me who You want me to help. Bring them to my door. Make it obvious what Your purpose is for me.

  Has there been a flood of people at my door? No! Have I found new and wonderful ways to teach and show Christ's love? No! But I am getting my house cleaning done! And when I need to drop my work to talk to a neighbor boy that needs food, I try to remember that I asked God to send people to my door! And the next day when he comes again, I try to remember again. 

  When I teach my daughter a new skill, when my son learns another lesson on controlling his anger, I try to remember that even though settling fights and doing laundry might not be my passion, it certainly is part of my purpose. Even when I feel insignificant, forgotten, disappointed; if I am filling my purpose, if I am doing what God created me to do, then He can give me the passion for it.